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Homer Simpson quotes:
Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand? Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)
Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon? Lisa: No. Homer: Ham? Lisa: No. Homer: Pork chops? Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal. Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.
Homer: [drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.
Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup? Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa. Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product. Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy? Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning. Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart. Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out. Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said. Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case. Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to. Homer: Bart, go to your room.
Homer: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.
Homer: There's your giraffe, little girl. Ralph Wiggum: I'm a boy. Homer: That's the spirit. Never give up.
Homer: How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
_________________ "Your work is to discover your world, and then with all your heart, give yourself to it." -Buddha
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